What is un?
by Van 'n' Kim
Summary: Iruka Umino is your average Chuunin. He has his share of troubles, what with Kakashi chasing after him and wannabe ninja students to deal with. But his trouble really starts when it rained from the sky... Literally. KakashiIruka DeidaraIruka
1. Chapter 1

Van: This is just a fun fic that I decided that I would make since I'm bored and waiting on people to comment on my other fics. Don't ask why the pairings. Don't flame either, because it's only for fun and if you don't likey, no reading, okies?

Deidara: You never even watched Shippuden! Why are you even making a fic with me in it, un?

Van: Hmph, Just cause!

Deidara: Why Iruka? I never even met him, un!

Van: Because, it's interesting! (claps in excitement)

Iruka: I have a bad feeling...

Kakashi: Is it really going to end up as D/I? I'm really curious.

Van: Well it really depends on the readers. And about age... XD Well, let's just say Deidara goes for older guys!

Deidara: I do WHAT, un?!

Disclaim: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!

Ch. 1 Art is a bang, yah?

Ohayo, minna-san! I am Umino Iruka, of Konohagure, and I'm a chuunin of great years. I specialize in teaching the future generation in order to prepare them to become full-fledged ninjas! And I don't mean people that dress in black and go "WHO-WAH!" and "HI-YAH!" and wave their arms like idiots. Anyway, I must be pretty lame, since I'm still a Chuunin after several years of experience and I should have become Jounin, but I simply choose not to take it. Little did I know that my troubles were REALLY beginning first off with a certain Jounin named Hatake Kakashi... Really should have avoided him.

He has this idea in his head that since I'm not really going out with any girl, I'm actually a gay! And what other guy could I ever want than him?! So he sent me flowers and poetry and even gave me a declaration of love. To which I had to avoid by going straight to the classroom to give lessons.

Alright so today was a pretty good day so far. I only recieved an Icha Icha Paradise book, which I kept in the deeeeeep corner of dooomm... I visited my parents' graves and gave my respect, wishing that they could help me.

"Oy, Iruka!"

Speak of the devil.

"Where have you been all my life? 3" Kakashi ran up to me and proceed to try to hug me, of which I dodge.

"Knock it off, we're in a cemetary!" I scold.

"Oh? So later then?" Kakashi said seriously.

"Huh?"

"You know... Us, alone, your place, my place." He shrug, but had a really scary glint in his visible eye.

"Oh no, Kakashi, I have to, uh, get going! Because you see, with the offering, I forgot it and- SEE YA!" I quickly ran away from the scary copy-nin. Oh my god, I could swear I hear his voice laughing from far away!

* * *

When I finally got the offering, the incense, and the match, everything was so peaceful, I didn't even realize God was going to drop a bomb on me. Literally. 

From up above, a blond falls right on top of me. EVERYTHING SPILLS! The incense, the offering! How long did it took me to create that offering! The endless hours of hard work, gone in one blow! Just because of Naruto! Oh wait a minute... That's not Naruto.

"Uuuhh... I see stars, un."

Un? What is "un"?

* * *

Van: And cut! That's it so far! Ok, kidding.

* * *

I should have obeyed my first instinct and just let him there. 

_'He's going to cause you trouble! Blondes don't fall out of the sky every day you know!'_ My inner self scream.

But I lift him and carried him to my apartment.

_'You're going to regret it!'_

So now I have an unconcious boy that fell from the sky. Joy. In addition, he's in my bed, and further more, it's likely that he's an enemy. Housing him would make me an associate in the crime he may or may not have commited. Come to think of it, isn't it more logical to get him to the hospital, or report his presence? I rouse from my thoughts as he begin to awaken.

"U-uh, where am I, un?"

I try my best to smile. "Hey. You okay there?"

"I'm okay, yeah." He look around confused. "Where am I, hm?"

Oh yeah! "You're in my apartment room. You kind of... Fell. I found you and brought you here. Don't worry, I didn't do anything." I wave my arms in absolute desperation.

He grins at me. And laugh.

And laugh.

And _laugh_.

I glare at the boy. Didn't they teach him manners?! "Well, if you have that much energy, you must be okay, so up you go."

The boy seem a bit shocked. Haha, back to ya. "Hey, I'm still unwell, un." He pouts.

I sigh and decide to start over. "So. What's your name?"

He blinks. Twice. "My name, un?" He asks nevously.

"Yes." I grumble agitatedly. Hey, you try handling a hyperactive with a guy chasing after you and boys falling from the sky! You'll see what I mean! Unless your a female, but that's another thing.

"Oh, my name, yeah!" He says happily. He waved his hand at me to come closer.

I sigh and lean in my ear.

"It's **BUBBA**! (un) "

My ears are ringing! I swear they are!

He snickers at me.

_Keep calm, he's an injured boy, keep calm..._ I keep telling myself in my mind. "So, your name's actually **Bubba**?" I ask trying to be friendly.

"No. It's **BUBBA**-un." He says grinning.

"Why do I get the feeling you're messing with my head?" I mutter. Unfortunately he catches it.

"Because I am, un."

I groan. Seriously, what is "un"?


	2. Chapter 2

Van: Thank you to those that even bothered with this fic! I know the pairings are weird, but it's my ficcy! No like, no read, comprende? Hehe.

Deidara: Bubba-un?! What kind of name is that, un?!

Van: Aw, come on, Dei! Everyone knows you're not going to use that as your alias!

Deidara: But still! Me and Iruka, un?! And what's this about me falling from the sky?!

Van: You fell off your birdie.

Kakashi: Haha! You're so lame! Demo, what about me? I didn't get much on my part.

Van: Don't worry, you'll get your turn! And Iruka?

Iruka: What? (scared)

Van: Hehehe! You'll have lots of fun with these two men after you!

Iruka: NOO! Please no!

Van: It's futile! And this series is not mine!

Ch. 2 The power to copycat is NOT the ability to flirt!

-Temporarily Kakashi's POV-

Ohayo, minna. I am the famous/infamous Copynin of Konoha. I don't know what Iruka said about me, but I have to say, I am quite the understanding guy. Iruka hasn't gone out with any of the ladies, not even with Kurenai! And she's the cream of the crop! She made Konoha's top model for five years straight! So it's logical that the guy has interests with another gender! Otherwise known as men. And what other guy does he probably like than me?

Not to brag, but I have been rated Konoha's most eligible bachelor and the top greatest to-die-for nin. Anyway, to question my... Preferences, I'm a bi. Besides, Iruka had been on my list for a while, ha! But seriously, we've been through thick and thin together and it's just that I admire many qualities of him. But rather than bore you on that, I'm here right now at his apartment. Not that we're going to do anything, but it would be funny to see that cute face light up while thinking dirty. Ha.

I knock on the door patiently.

* * *

-Iruka POV- 

I hear knocking on my door and panic. _'Oh man, oh man! What will I do?!_' I looked at the situation. The boy seemed to have become _very _comfortable with the bed. He's definitely not getting out anytime soon. Tch. And the knocking isn't stopping! I glare at the so called "**Bubba-**un"

"Well?"

He stuck out his tongue at me.

"Fine" I mutter going to the door. "Kakashi!" I said with a big smile on my face. "What a surprise!"

"Hey, Iruka!" I could see him grin behind the mask. "So whatcha doing?"

"Oh nothing! Nothing at all! Ohohoho!" I laugh. Jeez what in the world was I doing? Oh yeah, if Kakashi finds this kid in my bed, he'll call the town, and I'll be the next Orochimaru! I could picture it now... Iruka... Konoha's pedophile! Hide your kids! I grinned at the copy-nin.

"So why are you here?"

"Oh, nothing, just decided to drop by... Can I come in?"

I began to panic. "Oh no! No, er... You know, I've been thinking about that offer you made... About us and I figured, hey, maybe it could work!"

I suddenly saw Kakashi's eye hold a very funny gleam.

"Really..." He says leaning really close.

"U-un!" What the heck?! Why'd I say that!

Kakashi takes my hands up and I could swear there were flowers bursting right behind him!

"I'll be waiting for you. 7 o'clock this Friday."

Huh? What?

He then released my hand and winked. "Ja ne."

POOF! and he was gone. Matte! Did he just arrange a date with me without my consent?!

I sigh and turned around to get inside, when I saw a smiling blonde sipping my tea. "What the hell?! YOU DIDN'T LEAVE YET?!"

He pouts. "And here I thought you like me, un."

"What?!"

"Do you like him, hm?" The blonde suddenly ask curiously.

"What do you mean?!" I shout.

"Fine, if that's the case..."

What's wrong with him? He suddenly had a strange malicious look.

"I have to go to work with you, un."

NANI?!

"It's reasonable, since I have nothing to do, you still haven't taken care of me properly and I'm pretty sure Konoha would love to know of your lovely relationship." He snicker.

I compose myself looking away. "Tch. Kakashi would probably do that anyway!"

"Oh? Then what if I told Kakashi what you and I did while you were "taking care" of me?" The... The BRAT! He's blackmailing me!

"Stupid kid." I mutter tossing him some clothes.

"Hey! I'm no kid!"

* * *

"Now, children, can anyone tell me what chakra is?" I ask the class. 

There was no indication of raising hands nor enthusiasm save for the Ino-looking guy sitting in the center of all those kids. I groan inwardly and did the dreaded act of picking him.

"Chakra is the energy used to perform certain types of ninjutsu and genjutsu. There's also taijutsu, but you don't use chakra for that. And furthermore-"

"Uh, that's nice, Dara.(Deidara)" I quickly cut in.

I saw the looks of the other children at him. It wasn't pretty. He then sticks his tongue at them. Oh, that can't be good.

"You jerk!" One kid leaps onto him suddenly. "Get 'im guys!"

All the other kids scream and latch onto him. Shrieking and punching, etc.

Dara then threw them off with ease, but it was really harsh and I ended up having my hands full trying to save them.

So now, I had to keep Dara from killing my students, and to do that, I decided to move onto a new subject.

"Who wants art class to start now?"

Every kid raised their hand and so I lead Dara out of the room, who was protesting about 'masterpieces' and 'amateurs' and what kind of medium was being used.

"Look," I explain. "I'm not the art teacher, but the teacher that gives them training on becoming ninjas! The art teacher is someone else!"

"So you know nothing about art?"

"No! I do know about art, it's just that I don't teach it!" I snap back.

For some reason, he was grinning.

"Good, un!"

Can someone _please_ tell me what is un?


	3. Chapter 3

Van: Well, I don't know why I bother. Deidara's such a chicken!

Deidara: I'm no chicken! I just think me and an old guy is weird, un!

Van: Suure... That's not what you said when you were in his room last night! XD

Deidara: O////o;;; Un?

Disclaim: I don't own anything.

Ch.3 Ichiraku

I sigh once more pulling Dara's hand. I don't even know his real name, nor why I'm even bothering with him in the first place! Apparently he's hungry right now, so I took him to Ichiraku's ramen place. "So what do you want?"

Dara shrug, so I order two bowls of beef ramen. As we ate, I notice suddenly that Kakashi is walking by. Shoot!

"Iruka!" He gives his accursed call. "What's up, Ichiraku's again? You need to lay off the stuff, you'll get sick." Kakashi said sitting next to me.

Oh no... Apparently Dara doesn't like the guy... He's growling like a dog!

"Ehehe..." I scratch my neck nervously. "Well, Ichiraku's is the best!"

"Yeah, what sensei said!"

I scream as Naruto, the little trouble-making genin, pops right on my lap out of nowhere.

"Hi Iruka-sensei!" The boy grins right at my face.

I did the most logical thing...

I bopped his head.

"Itai! Iruka-sensei, that hurt!" I laugh at his pouting face, then I frown.

"Naruto, you know better than to do that!" I scold.

"I'm not a kid, sensei... But anyway, Kakashi-sensei's paying, right?! I mean, he is your boyfriend, and all..."

I spurt soup away from the table. "What?" I choke.

Kakashi's eye seem to have a gleam as he holds my hand. "Remember... You said it could _work_..." He stress the word.

"Oh yes, indeed!" I laugh nervously remembering the very words I said. Darn it! It was then that I feel a hand pull my ponytail. "Agh!"

Dara pulled me away from Ichiraku's and far enough from Kakashi. Appalled, I turn to him.

"What did you do that for?!" I shout

"Because I don't like them! Un!" Dara shouts back.

"What?! How could you not like them?!"

"I don't know, I haven't spent enough time to know, yeah! But I hate them, hmph!"

"That's stupid!"

"You're calling me stupid?! Hmph!" Dara turns his head away from me. I can already tell he's irritated.

I sigh and place my hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong?"

Dara looked away. "N-nothing. Un..."

Well, it's obvious that there is something wrong! was what I wanted to say, but instead, I had to settle with, "Dara... I really want to help you... How can I if you don't tell me?" I notice that his visible eye lit up at this, so I look confused as he turns his head away.

"That sounds like something from a soap opera, un." He comments.

I then begin to think for a bit, before deciding on showing Dara some of the best things of the third Hokage's past time... Paintings.

He looks at every painting critically and I notice how his eye seemed to sparkle. I smile at that. _'He really looks cute like that... Wait, what?_'

"Hey, Iruka-san?" Dara looks at me with a weird look on his eye. "Can I have this?" He holds up one of the paintings that the third hokage had particularily made for his grandson, Konohamaru.

I shake my head no. "Sorry, but that's a really valuble painting that Sarutobi made since he's passed away."

He looks disappointed, so I tried to make the situation better.

"Say, Dara? Why don't we go explore the town a bit? I mean, apparantly you're not from around here, and-" Before I could finish, he latches himself onto my arm and flutter his visible eye's eyelashes.

"You could tour me any day, un."

I got confused on why he says it in such a strange tone. It's like he's talking about something else entirely. I shake the thought out of my head as I was dragged by the blonde. "Slow down, Dara!"

"Heck no! I'm really eager for this tour, un!"

"Okay, um, let's go here. This is the dango shop that is really the best in the village. Because of that, they tend to overprice their products tenfold." I say while pointing out the store. I did not notice Dara heading there until it was too late.

"15.00 dollars (I don't know the Naruto currency) for one stick of dango, are you kidding me, un?!"

"Our products are only the highest in the market! They are handmade and each dango stick takes hours to make. Be fortunate that it isn't higher!" The dango shopkeeper huffs.

"Why I oughta-"

"Okay, enough of that, Dara!" I drag the shouting blonde out as he says something about Katsu-ing the place... Whatever that means.

I then decide to take him to the bookstore. It turned out that there was a 75 percent off sale on all Icha Icha Paradise Beachtown series volumes. Apparently, Dara never even heard of Icha Icha, so I decided since he was of age to let him read the first volume. I realize it was a mistake.

"Oh wow, un..." His visible eye transfixes on the book pages.

"Okay, maybe it's a bit too much for you. I'll have that back now." I reach to get the book back, but the boy won't give it to me!

"No, no! Mooore! Mooore! I must read more, un!"

"Give it to me!" I shout as I reach for it once more.

"**_Un! Uuuuuuuun_**!" My goodness! He was no longer speaking words!

I grab the book and usher him out. _'Definitely not a good idea to let him in the bookstore._' I note. Then I decided to get to the next stop, which was the onsen.

Everything was fine, since the place gave out a soothing atmosphere. I sigh while laying back in the spring. God, I needed this! I peer over to where the blonde is... Which is out of the water. I quirk an eyebrow. "Aren't you coming in?"

"No way! The water's too hot, yeah!" Dara shakes his head while hugging his towel... In such a feminine way!

"It is not too hot, now get in here, you're causing a scene!" I point out.

He looks left and right for a while, pausing at some guys who were indeed watching warily. He dips his toe in hesitatingly before finally slipping in with me. For a while he speaks no word to me.

"So." I said conversationally. "Where exactly do you come from?"

Dara suddenly squeaks. No, he didn't speak, but _squeak_, "Where do I come from, un?"

I nod, but he averts his gaze.

"I don't have a home..."

That was odd! He didn't end it with un! Wow, he must really not have anywhere to go... I scratch my ear feeling awkward. "Sorry."

"It's okay... I don't really mind it much, un..." Dara whispers.

I blink and try to ease the situation. "Well, don't be like that! Least you get to travel around, don't you?!" I said slapping his back.

At that, he becomes quiet.

I laugh nervously. Was that the wrong thing to do?

"Yeah! I mean the atmosphere and the air is so refreshing, un!" He grins at me.

I then smile in relief. "You travel alot from the sky, don't you? What's it like?"

"It's amazing, un! To feel the wind in your hair, not a care or worry in the world... Un." Of course, he had to add that, but I suppose I'll let it slide... for now.

"Really?" I say as I take a few glances at the sky. It was a great afternoon, with the sun already setting and stars appearing across the heavens.

I become unaware of the blonde beside me, that is until I felt his arms wrap around me. I grow stiff at his touch.

"What's wrong Iruka, un? I thought you would be prepared for anything, hm?" For some reason... His voice makes me shiver... And my face heat up...

"What are you doing?" I murmur, to which he chuckles.

"Isn't it obvious?" I see that his hair had been let down and drenched with the steam of the spring water. His eye twinkles merrily. I widen my eyes as his face grew close.

"Geronimo!"

SPLASH!

I gasp and gag. Some water got in my throat damnit!

"Hahaha! Iruka-sensei, you look ridiculous!" Naruto declares. Stupid brat!

"NARUTO! WHAT THE HELL?!!!! YOU MADE ME CHOKE ON ONSEN WATER!!!!" I shout at the kid while shaking him furiously.

"A-yah-yah-yah-seens-suh-suh-say-ah-yah-yah!" Jeez! So I release him and he grins that grin that he usually does. "So, sensei? Why'd you leave so early, anyway? Kakashi-sensei was really depressed!"

At that, I gulp with guilt. Oh yeah, come to think of it, it was rude to just leave him there, wasn't it? "Well, the thing was that, um, I had a friend that I had to help out pretty quick, but it's taken care of right now." I look toward the direction where Dara was, but he wasn't there.

Naruto looks in the direction I was in a confused manner. "Huh? Why are you looking over there?"

I shake my head sighing. "Nothing."

"So anyway, Iruka-sensei! Why the heck did you go for Kakashi-sensei, anyway? Are you a homosexual?" Naruto asks me those stupid words. I swear, they came with malice!

"I do what I do, Naruto... It doesn't mean I'm a homosexual." I mumble.

"But you're dating Kakashi-sensei! You must be one!"

OUCH! Those words hit hard. I cry as the meaning ran home.

"Ne, ne, but you're right, you might not be a homo..."

Phew! So Naruto understands my situation!

"You could be a bi."

I take it back. I take it ALL back!

"Itai! Iruka-sensei, that hurts so much!" Naruto rubs his head.

I sigh and got out of the onsen.

"Hey, sensei, where are you going?" The kid calls.

"I have to go home." I answer.

"Okay! I'll visit you tomorrow sensei!"

I laugh. It's hard to stay mad at such a cute kid. "Okay, okay!" I call back. I dried myself and dressed, to find Dara waiting outside, and dressed of course.

"What took you, un?" He asks.

"Why'd you leave?" I ask back.

"Un." was his answer.

Such a weird kid!

"Um, if you don't want to tell me, that's fine." I grin.

"Un." He answers

WHAT THE HECK?! SOMEBODY PLEASE TELL ME WHAT IS "UN"?


End file.
